This morning on Pinterest, I was reminded of St. Catherine of Siena’s famous quote, “If you are who you were meant to be, you will set the world on fire.” Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about my purpose, the purpose of marriage, and the purpose of our marriage in particular.
Building the Kingdom. That doesn’t only mean co-creating children, necessarily. It means living to the fullest in your state of life. Christianity without suffering isn’t Christianity, it’s Paganism. We can all be nice and get along. What makes Christianity different? It’s our willingness to bear wrongs patiently in the name of our God. Its taking up your cross daily, and striving to live according to the Gospel.
We want to adopt someday. We’ve visited several local agencies and are forming a plan of how to go about this. For some reason though, I don’t feel that now is the time to start this process. We’ve only been married for a year, we have some debts we’d like to pay, and some traveling we’d like to do. We’d like to be in a position where I could stay home with the baby at least two or three days a week.
I feel like God is calling us to something else right now. I just don’t know what it is. And yes, we still have major emotional breakdowns whenever someone we know announces a pregnancy, but that has more to do with grief and less to do with adoption. Does it makes sense to say we’re peaceful about our current childlessness, yet grieving our infertility?
And so we will keep praying, keep loving, keep being. We know that God has plans for us, and so far He has only led us to beautiful, beautiful things.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
Tales from the Valley 
“peaceful about current childlessness and still grieving infertility” This makes total sense!
It is important to remember that adoption cures childlessness not infertility.
Praying for you as you continue to discern to what He is calling you.
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Thank you, Rebecca! I think for me, I need to be honest with myself and accept the difference between childlessness and infertility, and allow myself to grieve without pressuring myself to adopt yet.
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Thanks so much for your comments today Connie Ann. You handled with charity something that could easily have spiraled out of control and stolen the focus of the comments. And you said it so eloquently. I really appreciate it!
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You are so welcome, Kendra! I’m so happy that I could help. I really appreciate the post that you wrote. It meant so much to me. I actually found your blog because the post was shared in a Catholic infertility group I belong to. Thank you for writing it!
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Hi! I just found your blog a moment ago =) I have a blog too (eccefiat11@blogspot.com) and I wanted to say “hi” in particular because we also live in Maryland and also are looking into adoption agencies! If you wanted to connect or chat about that, I’d love to. We’re just at the beginning stages. We are always happy to meet other local Catholic couples who are dealing with IF (of course, not happy they’re dealing with IF…!) We’re attending a mass this Saturday at St. Jerome’s in Hyattsville: http://www.adw.org/hope for infertile couples. We went last year and it was a blessing, and we personally know the speakers this year, who are wonderful, holy people. Just wanted to tell you about that if you didn’t already know! Also – sorry this is getting long! – my husband is a CUA grad too (2007).
Anyway – I look forward to reading your posts! Blessings to you and your husband!
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Thank you so much for reaching out!! It means so much to me. Unfortunately we can’t make the St. Jerome’s Mass, but heard about it last year and love that they do something like that! I would love to connect! Just sent you an email. 🙂
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